He Cried

When I called the woman’s father to talk about his daughter’s funeral, he was quite nice.  He was a soft-spoken man who spent a few minutes with me on the phone only to say “she was a perfect daughter.”  There was nothing else for him to say.  He didn’t know any of her hobbies or friends.  He wasn’t aware of her favorite foods or music or even if she went to church.

That’s because she had become a recluse with her boyfriend over the previous 10 years.  She was 70 years old when she died.

When I arrived at the funeral home, I met with the woman’s oldest son who also was very nice.  He said very matter-of-fact, “I really can’t tell you much about mom.  I’ve hardly seen her in the last 10 years.  Once she got with her boyfriend, she just stopped coming around.”  Her daughter told me the same thing.  The youngest did too.

The eulogy was very brief.  Many of them are.  But this was the one I had to add some “color” to the information I had just to let everyone know that this woman still had value in the eyes of God.

There were no tears at the service, but it wasn’t because she wasn’t loved.  They just didn’t flow.

At the cemetery, I read Scripture and prayed and thought the family would pick up and go home.  But, instead, the oldest son got up to say something else.  And he cried first.  And again.  He took a couple of deep breaths and started again.

“Life is short, as the pastor said.  We need to spend time together as a family before it’s too late.  We don’t know when we’ll take our last breath.”  Then he cried again.

He cried because he had lost his mother before she died.

The stories of life sometimes have the shortest chapters.  There’s not much information because no one knows what to say.  Yet, there still is a message here:  Value life.  Spend time together.  Ask the right questions.  Laugh. Love.  And then when the time comes, your eulogy won’t be a one-liner.